BCS Tickets, Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Me:  It couldn't possibly be that hard to find tickets to the National Championship game.
Ticket God:  Have you checked Stubhub?  Oh, my bad.  Just kidding. 
Me:  So it is that hard.
Ticket God:  Possibly.  You don't have a few thousand dollars?
Me:  No.
Ticket God:  Well...
Me:  Is there anything I can do?
Ticket God:  Just show up.  I'll see what I can do.
Me:  Thank you, Ticket God.  Thank you.